Second Chances

       "You know, my sister? Second chances can almost never be as good as the first one.... So don't take it for granted. I Did that mistake and I will forever regret it." She finished her words and left me.I stood there taking in the meaning of what she had just told me. I was shocked to find the mere implication of those words with the feelings that I was currently going through.

        It was late in the afternoon, almost time for evening prayer. I was rushing home from the near by park  with kids for that reason. That's when this lady, in her late thirties, walked towards me and asked me where exactly is this place. She had a hand drawn map of sort in her hand of the locality. She was searching for the park. I gave her instructions to reach the park and back to her home which was also not far. As I was about to leave she caught my hand ans asked whether I was very busy. I sensed that she wanted to talk. Despite in a hurry I waited. She started telling me her story. She was new in the country.She had come after her marriage withe her new husband to start a new life.Talking of that she told me it was her second marriage. She had left her daughter from the first marriage at her home back in India. And obviously she was feeling terrible. Not only because she was away from her daughter but also because she was terribly missing he first husband.

        They were happily married with a daughter and a small life when she got a job abroad and went there in the hope of making life better for the family.  The first few months passed in pain and agony as she was away from her loved ones. Then slowly she got at ease with her new job and colleagues. New friends were made and life became good, With the new found independence and money she started changing, There was nothing wrong with having a little fun, was there? Soon a new friend came into her life and she found herself drawn to him.
        To cut it short her husband found out her affair an hell broke loose, He divorced her and left her daughter with her. By then she lost the job and also the lover was gone. she was left with nothing. Heartbroken she went back to her home where she wasn't really welcome. Unable to support herself and her daughter alone, she got married again. Now she was here with him. Though the new husband accepted her daughter he was not ready to to let her stay with them.

        And here she is telling me how she had lost it all trying for a second chance while she had everything best in life in her hand.
        First chances need to be given your best before seeking another. Who knows if that was your best chance at life!!
       

Love, unconditional.

         The girl was obviously in distress. Tears were running down her cheeks, Though she wasn't crying aloud. She looked desperate and barren. About 5 to 6 yeas of age, dark and beautiful.

         I had just completed my daily morning walk in the park and was about to return when I spotted her. Something struck me hard. It wasn't uncommon to see kids crying in the park and shopping malls unable to find their parents. My own son was lost once and thank God, was found even before i found out he was lost. Thankfully in this country, being one of the safest in the world,children are, almost never, lost. I should say, children born and brought up here are very lucky that they are loved and wanted. That is not the case with a lot of children these days. The world is increasingly seeing refugees most of whom are kids. They have such horrible, shabby, pathetic and unwanted childhoods.

         This girl had come with her father and while she was playing he had gone somewhere. She looked for him as far as she could see and started worrying. I tried talking to her. After a few attempts I could understand which language she spoke and was able to talk. It took a while to comfort her and send her back to playing. Since her father hadn't come yet I waited there for a while. Soon he came and I left, unnoticed,seeing the smile of relief on he face. 

        Coming back it kept me thinking. We believe children's love is unconditional. An infant is delighted seeing its mother. Young children run to their parents when they spot them and they are totally shaken when parents are away. My daughter panics if i am late from my shopping trips a bit late. She tells me she worried that I was hit b a car or someone attacked me. I am touched by t
he love and care. It overjoys me. But i wonder-is that really love that makes all kids worry when the are away from their parents? Or just a feeling of insecurity? Don't the same kids, when they grow up move farther and farther from us? We become of lesser and lesser importance to them. They would soon be happy to move away and start on their own once they are in their teens. So what happens to the innocent, unconditional love? It just turns conditional, measured and selfish.

         But what about the parents? They keep loving their kids no matter what. Wherever they are. Whatever they are. Their love doesn't demand anything back. Recently I read a story about an old woman who was kept in an old age home by her son. She spent there years.As she was approaching her final days she wished to see her son. When he came and met her in her death bed she told him she had two wishes that she wanted her son to fulfill. One was to install fans in every room of the old age home and the next was to buy a fridge for the kitchen. When her son exclaimed why she didn't complain about this while she was living there all these years she said "it was okay for me to live in this hot room eating spoiled food, But I worry about you when your own kids send you here on day!

       That's love, unconditional.

        

My shoes, alright!

Well, I had started this blogger account almost two years ago but never wrote anything. It was like an apt subject never came into my mind. Or rather, everything has been written about. Gender issues, acid attacks, climate change, pedoephelia, kiss of love, Syria , ISIS, what not ! I always wanted to stick to simple matters. After all life is best when it is the simplest. Why complicate matters!

That's when these two pairs of shoes came into our life. When my husband came back from the mosque and told me about how he lost his sandals it was nothing new. It happens in every mosque / church or temple. People knowingly or unknowingly walk away with other people's sandals. Some do so purposefully. Some by mistake. So this was a normal incident. Nothing to worry about. Less so to write about. But what happened afterwards made me write this. Here it goes.

My husband had gone to the mosque wearing a pair of sandals that he uses mainly for this purpose. Usually he remembers where he keeps his sandals outside the mosque and gets them back without any problem. But the other day as he was in a hurry somehow he happened to take another pair of sandals which appeared to be almost the same. Shortly he understood his mistake walking in a different pair of sandals but when he went back to check, his sandals were gone. He came back home
uncomfortable. But then, these types of things usually happen in mosques, temples and churches. It is of no use to worry about them. At least, he said, he got another pair of sandals, though cheaper ones,and didn't have to walk home on bare foot.
The twist came after two days. he had gone for the evening prayer a bit late. The jamaat prayer was over and the mosque was empty. After prayers when he stepped out he found his old sandals! The person who took it had returned them and was gone. My husband happily took his sandals and left the other pair back. The other man had got a slightly better but same size sandals. Why did he decide to replace them with his own ? Either he was a good Samaritan or he wasn't comfortable wearing another person's sandals.

Back home when he narrated this to me it left me thinking. However costly or comfortable, we are all are happy with our shoes. Our lives. We cannot just step into others shoes. Our lives too familiar to us. Just like that essay of John Milton, familiarity might breed liking too. However rosy from the out side everyone's life has plus and minus. Sometimes, the richest and luckiest people will be leading the saddest hollowest lives. And poor people living with content.No one would actually want to change shoes. Thank you Sir, I am happy with my shoes. I have got too used and accustomed to it that any other pair would make me uncomfortable.!